First thing that comes up is that I used to be such a bitch. It was my way as the “right” way, while erroneously thinking that I was such an open, and accepting person. I’m especially thinking of the period in my life when I was a vegetarian. I was soooopo spiritual and enlightened. Snarkkkhh! Not. But it is how easily I was able to fool myself into thinking that I was that amuses me now.
Nice sentiments, and I will admit that it is a better message than “We are all sinners and the Devil is about to devour us for eating that cream puff” nonsense. But still, it rankled. I think the god Chronos makes more sense. His sentiment is, “Be true to yourself, whoever that might be at the time.”
When I was 15, I lost my virginity to a boy I married three years later. It was in the back of his mother’s 1947 Buick, parked in her garage. Hormones, can’t live with them, can’t live without them. At 15, hormones ruled my world.
After that, even though I had some metaphysical beliefs, I wasn’t completely convinced that there wouldn’t be a horrible fate awaiting me after I died because I had sex with my boyfriend, so I married him. BIG mistake! He was a temperamental child with no ambition, little education, and spiritual beliefs that were completely opposite from mine. But, hey, hormones ruled. I was a teenager and the future was some nebulous hazy thing that didn’t feel real. Live for today.
